Bird Songs: Creation at Play

I have been feeling the need to get away and collect myself for a bit, so I decided to take this week and drive down to Toccoa, GA and spend some time with a group of my old college friends.  Toccoa is beautiful this time of year.  It is right on the edge of the southernmost Appalachians.  The area is full of dense forests, mountain streams, and plenty of waterfalls.

Yesterday I decided to take a walk in the woods and try to get some thinking done.  The forest canopy was thick and all along the way I was sung to by choruses of birds.  As I walked along the forest path along gentle streams and amidst wildflowers blooming, I could feel my spirits lifting just being outside in creation.

Maybe you believe in a higher power, maybe you don’t.  Regardless, looking at nature you’ve got to appreciate how excessive it all is.  There are so many textures, sounds, colors, it is mind boggling.  I remember reading once that the human brain must quickly develop an ability to focus on certain details, or else our minds would overload.  We are never, it seems, wholly conscious of everything that is going on, everything that we could be aware of.  A grown oak tree has millions of leaves.  The natural world has an absurd amount of detail.

I was taking all this in when I heard the laughter of my favorite bird, the Pileated woodpecker.  If you’ve never heard their call, it is really quite thrilling and nearly impossible to mistake (worth checking out online). The German theologian Jergen Moltmann once said, “Creation is God’s play, play of his groundless and inscrutable wisdom.  It is the realm in which God displays his glory.”  I can believe that when I hear the Pileat.  Incidentally, in the southern Appalachians, Pileated Woodpeckers were sometimes referred to as “The Lord God Bird.”

The creator was at play when he made the world.  It was frivolous, excessive, an act that needed no purpose, justification, or motivation.  From Moltmann again, the creator “did not have to create something to realize himself.  As we were saying, he has brought forth his creation to enjoy it.”  And the creation, in turn, enjoys itself.  Why does a Sparrow sing or The Lord God Bird laugh?  It sings itself.  It needs no reason to sing.  It sings to enjoy its song, to delight in its very existence.  The bird’s only purpose, if it can be called a purpose, is to take joy in its existence, in the existence of the creation surrounding it, and in the existence of its creator.  The birdsong is the vehicle which The Lord God Bird uses.  This is the demonstrative joy of existence.

But existence itself, the creation, is marred.  When we speak of joy we must inevitably speak of sorrow.  The birds have forgotten how to enjoy humanity and we have forgotten to enjoy The Lord God Bird.  Pain and death are realities, and they are found in birdsong.  For each laugh that The Lord God Bird lets out, there is another song of sorrow heard with equal frequency.

So we humans must learn remember to make song, to find joy in our very existence, in the existence of creation, and in the existence of the creator.  We do that through play, through creativity, through purposeful living, through listening to birdsong.  We also sing our sorrow, and there must be a place for that.  Andrew Bird, so aptly named, demonstrates demonstrative joy in existence.  I finally realized why I like him so much.  His lyrics may not necesarily have purpose or meaning that I can fully understand, but his songs are like beautiful games to me. Again, Moltmann says, “a game is meaningful within itself but it must appear useless and purposeless from an outside point of view.”  His songs pervade joy, and in an instant, sorrow.

I am sparrow, myself I sing.  No more is needed.  This post is a conglomerate of thoughts inspired by Jurgen Moltmann, Annie Dillard, Andrew Bird, and of course, The Lord God Bird.

an end of the year post

In less than 50 words, here was my year:

• graduated from college
• started graduate school
• moved to PA
• began work at Starbucks
• dropped out of graduate school
• quit dating deanna
• wrote a lot
• read a lot
• painted some
• still a pacifist
• met some great people and made some new friends

Best books I read this year:

• Dandelion Wine
• For the Time Being
• An American Childhood
• Pilgrim at Tinker Creek
• Watership Down
• The Omnivore’s Dilemma
• Sex, Economy, Freedom and Community

Favorite Music Albums:

• Tennessee Pusher, Old Crow Medicine Show
• Fleet Foxes, Fleet Foxes
• Andrew Bird and the Mysterious Assortment of Eggs, Andrew Bird
• A Ghost is Born, Wilco
• Drunkard’s Prayer, Over the Rhine

Most haunting quote of the year that I will take with me into 09:

Cry the beloved country, for the unborn child that is the inheritor of our fear.  Let him not love the earth too deeply. Let him not laugh too gladly when the water runs through his fingers, nor stand too silent when the setting sun makes red the veld with fire.  Let him not be too moved when the birds of his land are singing, nor give too much of his heart to a mountain or a valley.  For fear will rob him of all if he gives too much.

I hope two-thousand and nine is a year of:

• writing
• painting
• quiet

My Life as Delivery Boy

Well, here I am back in Toccoa for my senior, yep SENIOR year of college. The semester is officially on its way as the second week of the semester approaches its midpoint. My classes this semester turned out to be easier than those most recent, and so I’ve decided to try and work this semester. I applied at Wal-Mart, decided not to follow up, and ended up getting hired as pizza delivery man at Pizza Hut. I’ve only worked three days, but so far I love it. I make decent money with tips, and I get to drive around listening to music. Aside from that, I’ve met some interesting people on deliveries and at work.

One of the hardest things about attending school for me the last three years has been the lack of real human interaction. Over the course of my years here at Toccoa, I probably spent on average an hour a week off campus. Its nice to be interacting with people off campus on a regular basis. It helps me keep things in perspective and gosh I’m going to learn a lot.

Take my co-worker Billy (not his real name) for example. Billy is 26-28 years old, a Georgia native, grew up right around here. He’s been working at Pizza Hut for a couple weeks now, so next to me he is the newest employee. He is a fellow delivery man. My first day at work he was asking me where I was from and over the course of the conversation I revealed that I am senior at Toccoa, originally from New York. The conversation began as small talk but then Andy asked whether Toccoa Falls College was Christian college. I quickly responded that it was, but not everyone there is a Christian. It was as if I needed to defend the fact that I went there by explaining that not EVERYONE there is a Christian. It was a distancing, defensive response, and I recognized immediately how uncomfortable I felt with him and my other coworkers knowing that I am a believer. I’m a very analytical person, and even to this moment I am not sure whether I was worried about revealing my faith, or just worried about revealing my faith so soon. I think I envisioned my coworkers learning about my faith, but gradually and over time. But this was not the case. The conversation didn’t really go to much further that first night, we were both engaged with different tasks and so things were left essentially at that.

After analyzing things a bit more afterward, I realized my need to repent. My faith is a part of my life, a big part of my life, and people like Billy are the people I want to live among, serve and build relationships with. I prayed over the next day or so that I would have the opportunity to expound a bit more, and to be more honest with my beliefs. That prayer was answered today. Billy brought up matters of faith tonight at work and was very open with his beliefs and convictions. He revealed to me that he was baptized as a Pentecostal, had a bizzare, far out (his words), experience that sort of freaked him out and scared him from the church. Since then he goes to church occasionally but not really regularly. He confessed that he doesn’t really think that God has one name or that God is exclusively Christian. He mentioned that perhaps sincere Buddhists go to heaven as well. It was an interesting conversation and I felt really comfortable with him. I felt like my role tonight was more as listener, so I didn’t give my convictions about things, though I hope to sometime in the near future. I want to make sure I have the right to share my beliefs. Anyway, all that to say…I’m excited about this process, and I admitedly have a lot to learn.

People in this world are seeking something. Billy’s story is evidence of that. Why was I so shocked to here someone interested in matters of faith? Billy said something very interesting to me tonight about the church. Since working in Aliquippa, I’ve had a lot of time to think about the institutional church, and in diologeing with Pastor Joel, Pastor Jim, and Pastor Paul about the subject, I’ve had a lot of time to think about how distant it has become from society. Tonight Billy told me that he doesn’t get church. He doesn’t understand it and he doesn’t really like it. Some of the things there bother him, make him feel uncomfortable, and seem extra to him. Tonight as we were discussing this he said something profound…he said, “I think this is the church right here, Billy and Dean talking, that is the church.” How amazing that this seemingly naive redneck Toccoan who told me tonight it took him ten years to get his GED (I’m being deliberate with this description to prove a point) understands the church better than most “Christians” do! Jesus said wherever two or more are gathered in his name, there he is also, there is the church…This guy GOT it. Anyway, all that to say, I’m excited to begin forming relationships like this. I’ll be posting more about work in the coming weeks I am sure. Some might be lighter than this, I’ve got some great stories about deliveries…